We’ve officially been in Quarantine three weeks now and already I’ve been hearing people say they’re getting a divorce as soon as this thing ends. It’s definitely a time that can seriously test your relationship. Being stuck with anyone 24/7 whether it’s your husband/wife or even your roommate's cat can be tough.I’m going to be incredibly honest here. My relationship has definitely been tested during this time as well. It’s tough enough to deal with a partner's stress, but when you throw in a rebellious 2-year old and pack on about 20 lbs of pregnancy weight and add hormones, you have a recipe for disaster!
I noticed recently that my husband and I had been arguing more than usual. I'm sure some of it had to do with the fact that we no longer had our baby sitter and our businesses were impacted by the shutdown. The stress of the world and managing a business can be extremely difficult under normal circumstances. Now our outside circumstances are extreme so our emotions are heightened.
One night we were bickering and I had actually reached a point of tears when I realized we were both blaming each other for our behavior instead of taking blame ourselves.
I finally asked him what I was doing wrong in our relationship. And, he told me, and I was like “shit, I have been doing all those things your right”. After hearing directly from him. I decided to work on myself and use this quarantine to be a better version of myself. He listened when I told him where my frustration was coming from and has made some changes as well.
The true reason that we are with any given person is to learn. We learn from each other & grow, but most importantly we learn about ourselves. We get into relationships so we can help each other grow and become better people as the relationship grows. Being in a relationship isn’t easy and it takes work. You need to be able to speak freely to your partne and also know when to listen.
I decided to come up with some Quarantine Tips when things get rocky.
1. Be in CAUSE. Realize you probably have something to do with things not going right. Once we take responsibility things get easier.
2. LISTEN. Truly listen to your partner ask him/her what’s going on.
3. Take a minute to breathe, mediate, and get into a neutral mindset. When we’re calm we can analyze things much better.
4. Exercise/Dance/Jump it helps 😜
I hope this advice helps. And, if your relationship can’t make it through the test, that’s okay too. Sometimes spending a lot of time with someone can make you realize it’s not the right long term fit and has been a chapter in your life.
Enjoy your quarantine.